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Saturday, March 19, 2011

Forget Murderers. Public Enemies #1: DOG-HUMPERS!!!!

If you go to and compare the crime rates of, say, Los Angeles to Phoenix, AZ, you will find that both cities are comparable in terms of crimes committed. As a matter of fact, one could say that Los Angeles is safer, based that site crime indices.

Those numbers are based on FBI figures. In terms of property crimes, LA is lower than Phoenix, rating a 4 and 7 respectively (national average is 4). In terms of violent crimes (murder, rape, etc), both LA and Phoenix rate a 7 (national average 4). In other words, Phoenix is not a safe place to be.

So you would think that the city's sheriff, tabbed the toughest cop in America, would think that murderers, rapists and thieves would be his prime concern. No, no, no! It's........DOG-HUMPERS! That's right...DOG-HUMPERS...right here in River City!!

Read and hurl.....


America’s self-described toughest sheriff has issued a warning to the CEO of
Craigslist saying the popular Internet website is providing a “mechanism to
facilitate criminal activity.”

Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s warning to Jim
Buckmaster follows the arrest last month in Arizona by Maricopa County Sheriff's
Office detectives of two men — one a middle school teacher and the other a
handyman — on charges of conspiracy to commit bestiality.

Sheriff Arpaio
said an undercover investigation by his office began after detectives became
aware that persons in the Phoenix area were using Craigslist to engage in
illegal acts with animals. Detectives set up meetings through computer
communications where the suspects believed they were meeting animal owners at a

“I would hope that Mr. Buckmaster takes my advice seriously and
looks into our concerns,” Sheriff Arpaio said. “I think it is sad that people
would utilize technology to take advantage of animals like this.”

Although bestiality may not be illegal in other states, the sheriff was
instrumental in making the offense a crime in Arizona in 2006.

Craigslist CEO Jim Buckmaster is taking heat for postings on his
website. (Associated Press)Craigslist did not respond to questions sent by
e-mail to the company and to its public relations spokeswoman.

The men
arrested in February — handyman Keith Kiefer, 47, of Mesa, and middle school
music teacher Patrick Trejo, 25, of Phoenix — were accused of using to connect with dog owners offering their dogs for sexual
gratification with humans.

Sheriff Arpaio said his deputies later
learned that a number of people used the website to communicate with others who
had an interest in bestiality. He said detectives discovered that a secret
language was being used to hide the suspects’ plans.

According to court
documents, a detective posing as a dog owner responded to a posting Mr. Kiefer
listed on Craigslist. They exchanged e-mails in which Mr. Kiefer allegedly asked
for a photo of the male dog’s sexual organ. He received it and responded by
saying he “liked it very much,” the court records show.

In his letter to
Craigslist, Sheriff Arpaio said the investigation of “several others” was
ongoing and that the website had provided “the forum for these individuals to
post, in a very blatant manner, their intentions.”


Now, in my small circle of friends, the opinions about stuff like this ranges from "Man..that's sick!" to " Pomeranian was the BOMB last night!!" Therefore I cannot judge. Nor, since I do not have any pictures iof Mssrs. Keifer and Trejo, I do not know the level of desperation with these men (though one would probably argue that looking like a 2-legged emu might be a reason..)

Here's the thing. I know that those who thing something like doing-the-dog is highly disgusting claim that the pooch in question has no say in the matter. Oh. really? Then maybe we should also book all the people who force dogs (and cats, and other furries) to do non-sexual acts that the animals have no consent over (have you seen Letterman's Stupid Pet Tricks? Or even the stupider ones that wind up on, what a friend would call Screw-Tube?)

Again, I am not advocating anything, except keeping me safe. If Candy Sue wants to do the horizontal bop with her German Shepard, be my guess. I'm just worrying about the guy trying to climb into my house to steal my 50-inch Plasma TV.

MY suggestion to Mr. Arapaio would be to start actually arresting some real bad guys (and stop blaming it all on Mexican drug lords and the ACLU. We should legalize everything and make it here anyway, and as for those tree-hugging lawyers, the fact that prisons these days are obscenly overcrowded shows that the ACLU ain't quite that effective).

But maybe I can understand where Big Joe comes from. First, he was worrying that his wife migh leave him for some black stud. Then for some other woman. NOW he has to worry about Rover. Maybe it's all just insecurity.

We feel ya, Joe. We feel ya.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Indeed Big D! "Read and Hurl"! LOL!
I HAVE to wonder WHY these Dick-Tectives are NOT guilty of "facilitating crime using an electronic device" as they are accusing these two "Two-Legged Emus" of doing. Did Arpiao NOT just "CONFESS" to this in public in his statement? CHARGE THESE DICKTECTIVES WITH A class 2 Misdemeanor!!!!