A journal of radical thoughts, ideas, musings, and rantings of a square peg adrift in a sea of round holes.
The fundament of Buddhist practice is ethics, and the backbone of Buddhist ethics is not harming any sentient beings. For common laymen, there are five ethical precepts you take (like not killing, not stealing, not lying, etc), one of which is avoiding sexual misconduct. What more precisely is included in "sexual misconduct" differs from culture to culture within the Buddhist world, but some things are always included, like sexual violence, nonconsentual sex, and sex with minors, close relatives, ordained monks/nuns or other persons under vow of abstention.
Included is also always having sex with another person's wife or husband (including another person living in a permanent relationship with someone else). Not only does it harm other persons, but it is also a manifestation of desire/craving, which is the most important emotion you have to work to diminish and ultimately eliminate, if you practice Buddhism seriously.
In principle, there are no Buddhist objections againt sex between two consenting adults who stand outside relationships with other persons (i.e. between singles), but that differs from culture to culture within the Buddhist world. Many teachers state more clearly that the only place for sex is within a long-term relationship. http://de.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071008163937AAECW3A
In Buddhism, forgiveness is seen as a practice to prevent harmful thoughts from causing havoc on one’s mental well-being. Buddhism recognizes that feelings of hatred and ill-will leave a lasting effect on our mind karma. Instead, Buddhism encourages the cultivation of thoughts that leave a wholesome effect. "In contemplating the law of karma, we realize that it is not a matter of seeking revenge but of practicing metta and forgiveness, for the victimizer is, truly, the most unfortunate of all. When resentments have already arisen, the Buddhist view is to calmly proceed to release them by going back to their roots. Buddhism centers on release from delusion and suffering through meditation and receiving insight into the nature of reality. Buddhism questions the reality of the passions that make forgiveness necessary as well as the reality of the objects of those passions. "If we haven’t forgiven, we keep creating an identity around our pain, and that is what is reborn. That is what suffers."
Buddhism places much emphasis on the concepts of Mettā (loving kindness), karuna (compassion), mudita (sympathetic joy), and upekkhā (equanimity), as a means to avoiding resentments in the first place. These reflections are used to understand the context of suffering in the world, both our own and the suffering of others.
“He abused me, he struck me, he overcame me, he robbed me’ -- in those who harbor such thoughts hatred will never cease.”
“He abused me, he struck me, he overcame me, he robbed me’ -- in those who do not harbor such thoughts hatred will cease.”
(Dhammapada 1.3-4; trans. Radhakrishnan) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Forgiveness#Buddhism
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